and yes we had a threesome in the bathroom
where I locked myself in with the cake
I pressed your waxy figure to my lips 
whispered a prayer for your aunts
who fluttered around to untuck my skirt 
it’s hard to take mooning seriously
when you’re wearing pantyhose
and now I want nothing more
than to be part of your deranged family
did I tell you it makes me happy
to see you so happy
well if I did I was lying what I meant 
I give it two years then who will take the cat
it was obvious no one wanted to dance
as I made my way toward the exit
waving my bandana with one hand
I performed a final leg lift 
its perfection hushed the room