Do you know where Shangri-la is? Ren has his ways. This step that step, he says tying my feet apart. My favorite thing during Shangri-la is to keep my eyes wide. It is mostly dark but if I keep my eyes wide the whole time, Ren’s face (his really true face) sharpens. When Ren’s face sharpens I feel like I am close to finding something out, a secret. Do you ever feel like that? I feel like I am about to trigger a cure for this sore, and gush like hell. During Shangri-la Ren’s face is closer than in Baba’s pirate-taxi. In Baba’s pirate-taxi Ren’s face is far from this face: this face grunting in the mattress releasing into me grunting in the mattress again. In Baba’s pirate-taxi Ren’s face is what I think America looks like. How close are we to America? That’s where Patsy Cline lives. I wonder if my face is what Ren thinks Shangri-la looks like? Almost always when Ren does Shangri-la, I keep my eyes wide keep my sights on Ren. That’s what Patsy would do. So that when she got out (and Patsy always gets out) she’d belt every song in that scratchy face.